My name is called and in I go to see the nurse. It is not the usual one.
She has a go at my left arm.
"Hmmm, now where has that vein gone?" Tap, tap, squeeze, fumble, STAB
"Hmmm, we seem to be losing the flow. What's going on here then?"
By now I'm feeling a bit woozy. She starts digging about and after a few minutes gives up, bandages my arm, and says, "OK, well, we'd better have a go at the other one."
Christ. I'm definitely getting a touch of the vapours
So she starts digging away again and finally, finally, manages to get a tubeful. She's just bandaged up my second arm, when in walks another nurse who stops dead, looks at Nurse No. 1 and says,
"Who are you?"
WHAT THE HELL?
"Now just a little prick..."
I leg it before the new one tries to get another armful.
I have no idea who the first one was, but I did get the results back a few days later. Everything was OK, except apparently I'm 4 weeks pregnant.
I made that last bit up, but only the last bit...
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